Happy Birthday to Us!

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 4^th October 2022, when we will be celebrating our tenth birthday.  We will be eating together to celebrate at 6.30pm with cake and games afterwards.

As is now traditional on our birthday, the “Feature Game” will be Crappy Birthday.  This is a party game where players give each other comedy birthday presents and the recipient has to decide who gave the best and worst gifts.

– Image by boardGOATS

And speaking of birthdays…

Jeff was at the surgery.  “Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake,” he explained.

The doctor asked him to open his mouth and say “Ahhh.”

After a few moments examination, the doctor said, “Next time, take the candles off.”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 20^th September 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer.  Please note that the pub will not be serving food on Tuesdays for the foreseeable.

To mark the passing of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II, the “Feature Game” will be Corgi Dash.  This is a retheme of Heimlich & Co., which was published as a “Jubilee Souvenir” earlier this year, by Tony Boydell.  Other games we’ll be playing will have a Queen, King, or otherwise royal-related theme, for example, Queen’s Necklace, Sleeping Queens, Kingdomino, Key to the City: London.

– Image by boardGOATS

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 6^th September 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer.  Please note that the pub will not be serving food on Tuesdays for the foreseeable.

This week the “Feature Game” will be Project L (rules, review & rules run through video).  Project L is a sort of Tetris-like, engine-building game, where players start with two pieces and use them to complete more puzzles and win more pieces enabling them to complete more complex puzzles and so on.

– Image by BGG contributor SynapticAcid

And speaking of Tetris…

Jeff was writing a novel based on Tetris, but was really struggling to make progress.  He explained to his wife, Jane, that he felt he really wasn’t getting anywhere and was finding it very depressing.

Jane asked what the problem was and why he was struggling.

Jeff replied, “I don’t know, but every time I complete a line it disappears…”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 23^rd August 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

This week the “Feature Game” will be Scotland Yard (rules, review & rules run through video), a semi-cooperative game where a team of detectives are trying to catch Mr. X who is on the run.  Mr. X moves around London taking taxis, buses or subways while the detectives, who nearly always know his mode of transport working together to trap him.

– Image by BGG contributor Gialmere

And speaking detectives…

Jeff was doing a stint in CID when his Sergeant asked him to take details of a non-dwelling burglary from the owner of the premises.

So, with his notebook at the ready, Jeff asked, “What is the nature of the business, sir?”

The man answered, “We deal in plant hire.”

Jeff looking a little confused, responded, “Don’t people buy plants?”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 9^th August 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

This week the “Feature Game” will be Alubari: A Nice Cup of Tea.  This is a re-implementation of the popular worker-placement game, Snowdonia.  The underlying mechanisms are essentially the same, but it has a smoother feel and of course, the setting is Darjeeling (in the Indian state of West Bengal) and it has addition of Chai, which players get from harvested tea leaves and adds to their actions.

– Image by BGG contributor LordBalder

And speaking of a nice cup of tea…

One day, Jeff phoned his girlfriend, Jemima, and said, “Can you come round please? I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t work out how to get started.”

Jemima asked, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?”

Jeff replied, “According to the picture on the box, it’s a rooster.”

So that afternoon, Jemima went round to Jeff’s flat and Jeff showed her where he had the puzzle spread all over the kitchen table. His girlfriend studied the pieces for a moment then looked at the box.

She turned to Jeff and said, “First of all, no matter what we do, we’re not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.”

Then Jemima gently took his hand, “Secondly, I want you to relax. Let’s have a nice cup of tea, and then…” she said with a deep sigh, “We can put all these Corn Flakes back in the box.”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 26^th July 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

Following the recent announcement of the Spiel des Jahres Award Winners, this week the “Feature Game” will be the Spiel des Jahres nominee, SCOUT (review, rules & how-to-play video).  This is a short ladder-climbing game that should leave time to play some of the other games that received nominations or recommendations this year like Trek 12: Himalaya (how-to-play video) and Ark Nova (tutorial & play-through) or the Kennerspiel winner Living Forest (set up and rules video).

– Image by BGG contributor kalchio

And speaking of ladders…

Jeff ran into the house shouting, “Mum, Mum! I’ve knocked the ladder down outside!!”

His mother replied, “Well, don’t bother me, go and tell your dad.”

Jeff answered, “Um, he already knows, he’s hanging off the roof…”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 12^th July 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

Following last week when we played Flamme Rouge to mark the start of the Tour de France, this week the “Feature Game” will be the older bike racing game, 6-Tage Rennen (aka 6 Day Race).  As for Flamme Rouge, players move their riders by playing cards and use slipstreams to gain an advantage, but it is more turn based than the newer game.  This should be quick to play giving everyone a chance to play something different.

– Image by boardGOATS

And speaking of bicycles…

Jeff was riding his bicycle up and down the street when he saw his mum in the front garden. He let go of the handlebars, waved his hands in the air and yelled to his mum “Look mom, no hands!”

His mum replied, “Be careful darling…”

Jeff was enjoying showing off however, so he lifted his feet off the pedals and shouted, “Look mum, no feet!”

His mum replied more sternly, “Be careful, darling…”

Then suddenly, there was a loud crash as Jeff and his bike hit the tarmac. His mother ran over and, as Jeff slowly got back up, he said, “Look mum, no teeth!”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 28^st June 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

This week, to mark the start of the Tour de France on Friday, the “Feature Game” will be the Peloton expansion for Flamme Rouge (review, rules & explanation video).  Flamme Rouge is a fast-paced, tactical bicycle racing game where each player controls a team of two riders: a Rouleur and a Sprinteur with the aim being to cross the finish line first with one of their riders. Players move their riders by playing cards and use slipstreams to avoid exhaustion and position their riders to sprint for the win.

– Image by BGG contributor aldoojeda

And speaking of bicycles…

Jeff was sitting in the pub beer garden with his mate Joe chatting about life.

“I’ve really had it with my dog,” said Jeff, “He’ll chase anyone on a bicycle.”

Joe answered, “Ahh, that’s annoying is that.” He took a long pull at his pint before he continued, “So what are you going to do—leave him at the dog’s home? Give him away? Sell him?”

“Oh no, nothing that drastic,” replied Jeff. “I think I’ll just confiscate his bike.”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 14^st June 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

This week, the “Feature Game” will be the Moor Visitors expansion to Viticulture, which we will play together with the Tuscany board (rules etc.).  Viticulture is a worker placement game about planting vines, harvesting grapes and making wine.  The Moor Visitors expansion adds extra cards while the Tuscany expansion provides changes to the seasons the actions occur in and provides a couple of extra mechanisms for getting points.

– Image by boardGOATS

And speaking of wine…

Jeff was driving down a country lane when he met a car coming the other way. Unfortunately both drivers were going a bit quickly and as they came round a blind corner they collided. Both cars involved were completely wrecked, but amazingly neither Jeff nor the young lady driving the other vehicle were hurt.

After they climbed out of their cars, the young lady said, “Just look at our cars! There’s nothing left, but fortunately we are both unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days.”

The lady was very good looking and her car looked very valuable, so Jeff, thinking his luck was in, replied, “I agree with you completely.”

The woman continued, “And look at this, here’s another miracle. My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of wine didn’t break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.”

She handed the bottle to Jeff, who, mentally checking whether it was his birthday, opened it, drank half and then handed it back. The woman took the bottle, screwed the cap back on and handed it back to Jeff.

Jeff looked a little confused and asked, “Aren’t you having any?”

The woman replied, “No. I think I’ll just sit here and wait for the police…”

Our next meeting will be Tuesday 31^st May 2022.  As usual, we will start playing shorter games from 7.30pm as people arrive, until 8pm when we will start something a little longer (table is booked from 6.30pm for those who would like to eat first).

This week, the “Feature Game” will be Die Wandelnden Türme, a clever little family game where players take it in turns to move Wizards or Towers (rules, review & how-to-play video).  We played this last time, and it went down so well, we thought we’d make it the “Feature” this time.

– Image by boardGOATS

And speaking of Wizards…

Jeff and his wizard mates were playing with spells, and conjured up a magic slide into a pool. They put a spell on it so that whatever anyone said as they slid down the slide would appear in the pool.

Jeff’s first friend shouted, “BEEEEEERRRR!” whilst on the slide and landed in a pool of the best beer ever to be tasted.

His second friend yelled, “WIIIINNNEEE!” whilst coming down the slide and he landed in a pool of the most expensive wine ever to be made.

Finally, it was Jeff’s turn. He excitedly climbed up to the top of the slide and then, completely forgetting forgetting the spell, as he launched himself down the chute, he screamed, “WWWHEEEEEEEEE!”